Mr. Telephone Man

I wake up this morning and the rain is coming down hard. I get up, eat my breakfast and drink some coffee, trying to wake up so I can make my job phone call. Since I don’t have a landline, I have to call from my cell phone. Since I live in the buttcrack of Virginia, the only way to get a signal is outside. Out front. In my car aka my office.

I grab my job hunting notebook, my car keys and my phone and make the wet trek to my car. Scooter comes with me since he’s my assistant. He sits shot gun while I make the call. I use my bluetooth to talk on the phone. Like a large speakerphone but I’m talking to my car. Kind of like Kit on Night Rider. Only I’m not actually talking to the car. Well, sometimes I do, but we won’t talk about that.

As soon as I call Mr. Jobman, we have problems because my phone starts breaking up and he can’t hear me. Crap. This is not making a good impression! Plus, my assistant is whimpering from his seat. Probably because he was promised a ride but we are sitting in the driveway in the rain not going anywhere. How am I going to explain that? “Sorry, I’m sitting in my car with my dog because I’m a redneck.”

I guess not. Anyway, luckily after that, the call clears up and we start talking. I immediately realize this is a phone interview and I’m nowhere near ready for that. It’s early. It’s been a hundred years since I’ve had an interview.

I don’t remember it all, but here are some highlights:

He asks about if I’m working now and I tell him I was laid off and then he looks at my history and is like, “Wow, you were there a LONG time.”

Err… Thanks for reminding me? I’m like, “I KNOW! 12 years.” And yes, because I watch Friends everyday, I say it like Monica.

He asks what I know about the job and how my experience will help me. I remember some of the job requirements but not all of them. I read a lot of jobs descriptions. A lot. But I’m not going to admit that. I just start talking about what I did in last job and then I say, “It’s very similar to the job you have.” Then I wait. He doesn’t say, “Girl, you are crazy,” so maybe I made some sense.

He mentions how long the commute would be for me. I explain how I live in the middle of nowhere. I know how to commute. Been there, done that. Him: “There’s no direct route from your house to *blank*.” I guess he Mapquested it or something. Little does he know there’s no direct route from here to anywhere.
 
We talk some more and then he says he will send my information to the department who will be doing the hiring. He says they will be out of the next week but I should hear something by the 4th.

That’s my first phone interview! I think I did ok. At least I know what to expect next time! And he did say he would forward my information on so that’s something…

After that, I call and deal with some 401k stuff. That’s always fun. That guy kept me on the phone a lot longer. I’m not a phone person. I would much rather talk to people in person. Finally my calls are done, which is good because my assistant is bored and needs to pee on things.

Later when the rain stops, I take JJ up to town. We stop buy Target and I replace The Mortal Instruments with JK Rowling’s, aka, Robert Galbraith’s The Cuckoo’s Calling. I have to replace it because he came up to me earlier today and was like, “This book is a teenage romance.”

Me: “Just because Stephanie Myers provided a blurb doesn’t mean it’s a teenage romance.”

Him: “No, really, it’s just about teenagers.”

Me: “You’re 19. NineTEEN. Not 60. I think you can still read it.”

Him: “Whatever. You can have it.”

Oh well. It’s all good. All I wanted was for him to read. I will read The Mortal Instruments instead. And we got two books I wanted to read! Bonus!

Speaking of books, I finished A is for Alibi by Sue Grafton. I really liked it! Early 80’s are awesome. No cell phones and since it’s a library book, it’s actually from the 80’s and the book looks like it was typed with a typewriter. The book is gritty, which seems to be what I prefer lately. Nothing pretty.

Other than that, I ate too much cake (and some gummy bears) and didn’t exercise. This weekend that will change! You can’t exercise on rainy days. It’s not allowed!

I want to thank everyone who gave me good wishes on this follow-up call. I don’t know what will happen, but I feel like it’s a good learning experience either way.

Until tomorrow!

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